


cruel words and crueler urges

by Phantomxlegend



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Hurt Nico, Hurt Will, M/M, Mentioned Percabeth - Freeform, Sad Will, Slight hurt and comfort, but it's not that descriptive, depressing topics, descriptions of self harm, i wrote this all in like one sitting, mentioned jiper, mentions of self harm, nico and will get into a fight, nico messes up, solangelo, trigger warning, will is upset, will wasn't able to save someone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 07:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23467477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantomxlegend/pseuds/Phantomxlegend
Summary: Nico and Will get into a fight which doesn't turn out too well for their friendship.  Then, when Will fails to save a patient, things get too much for him and he does something drastic, something he thought he'd never do again.  Someone really needs to help them make up before something bad happens.Trigger warning: Mentions and slight description of self harm
Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson, Jason Grace/Piper McLean, Nico di Angelo & Will Solace, Nico di Angelo/Will Solace
Comments: 6
Kudos: 161





	1. just leave me alone

**Author's Note:**

> So, I wrote this all in one sitting today and that's the most that I've written in one sitting in a long time. I am going to continuously say this but: trigger warning, mentions and slight description of self harm. You can never bee too safe. This chapter isn't that bad but in the future chapters there will be. This might be a bit OOC but hopefully it's not too bad. Well, with that being said, enjoy the chapter. Also, slight spoilers to Mark of Athena (I'm only saying that because I had it spoiled for me too)

“Nico! There you are, I was looking around everywhere for you.” Will ran up to Nico.

“What?” Nico said, his hand instinctively going to rest on his sword which hung off of his belt. Will laughed awkwardly and took a step back.

“You weren’t at breakfast _or_ lunch, Nico you need to eat.”

“I ate last night, it doesn’t matter, I was busy with something with my dad so I wasn’t able to make it,” Nico explained, rolling his eyes. He crossed his arms in front of his chest.

“You were shadow traveling too!” 

“Yeah, how else am I going to get into the underworld besides dying?”

“Nico! I told you not to shadow travel unless it was absolutely necessary, what if something happens?” Will reached out, pressing a hand to Nico’s forehead checking for a fever, he started to check over Nico.

“Will stop!” Nico swatted his hands away and took a few steps back, “I’m fine, okay? Just drop it.”

“You could have gotten hurt, what were you doing for your father?”

“There were some runaway souls in the fields of punishment. He asked me to take care of it, Will I’m _fine_!” Nico glared daggers in Will’s direction but Will didn’t seem fazed by it.

“You shouldn’t do so many things for your day, just the other day you were down in the underworld the entire day just getting back at curfew. Too much underworld-y stuff is bad for you. I told you that. I worry about you Nico, you’re very reckless and I don’t want to see you get hurt any more than you already do.” Will frowned an expression that didn’t really suit his features. Nico hated that expression but instead of saying anything back to Will, he started to storm away.

“Nico, I’m not done talking!” Will went after Nico.

“Yeah, well, I’m done listening. I didn’t come back here just to be scolded by you.” Nico snapped, “just let it go, Will, I’m fine and I do whatever my father tells me to do. I can’t just deny an order from the god of the underworld.”

“I’m not saying to deny any order from your father, I’m just saying to take it easy for once. You need to make sure that you eat three meals a day and get the proper amount of sleep.”

Nico continued to walk away and Will continued to follow.

“Will, just stop! Why do you even care about me? I’m just another one of your patients!” Nico spun around, they were only a few feet away from the Hades cabin. Will could practically feel the anger radiating off of Nico.

“You’re not just one of my patients Nico, you’re my friend. And I like to make sure that my friends are in one piece and are taking care of themselves.” Will tried to keep his voice level, he was trying to stay calm, “Nico, I just want to help you. I don’t want to see you hurt, I especially don’t want to see you—” Will trailed off, leaving Nico to imagine what Will was about to say. Will only shook his head, running his fingers through his hair.

“I don’t need your help Will, I’m not injured and I’m perfectly fine.”

“Just maybe you should take it easy for a few days, I could check you up at the infirmary, make sure that you’re really okay,” Will said, his hand twitched at his side. Like he wanted to reach out again. Nico only scoffed.

“I’m not going to the infirmary Will. I. Am. Fine.”

“I just want to make sure that you’re alright, I’m your friend Nico.”

“No you’re not—” Will’s face dropped, his eyes widened with surprise and he took a few steps back. Nico saw the hurt evident on his usually cheerful face, but he didn’t stop. He was too far to stop, “I don’t have any friends. I’m the son of Hades, I can raise the dead. No one is my friend and it sure as all Hades isn’t going to be a son of freaking Apollo.”

“You’re bringing our parents into this?” Will asked, his attempt at staying calm thrown out the window, “Just because my dad is the god of the sun and yours is the god of all things dark and gloomy doesn’t mean that we can’t be friends. Look at Percy and Annabeth, their parents hate each other.”

“And they’ve known each other since they were twelve and have fallen into the pits of Tartarus for each other. That doesn’t have anything to do with their parents' rivalry.”

“And this does?” Will exclaimed, his face red with emotions.

“Just leave me alone Will! I’m tired of you trying to be my friend and pretend that you care about me. I’m tired of it, I’ve had to deal with this kind of stuff my whole life, so do me a favor and just leave me alone.”

“Nico, if you continue to push people away, you’ll end up being all alone because people won’t want to bother anymore.” Will blinked back tears, unsure if it was because of the hurt he felt or the anger.

“Good, then they’ve finally gotten the hint.”

They both were silent for a long time, at this point some campers had heard the commotion and had come to see what was going on. 

Will took a deep breath, not breaking eye contact with Nico as he stared knives into Will.

“Fine,” Will said, “okay, fine.”

Nico didn’t say anything.

“If you are so insistent, I’ll leave you alone. I won’t bother you anymore,” Will shrugged, taking a shaky breath, “I’m sorry for trying to play this game of friendship and trying to care about you.”

Will spun around on his heel and walked away to the infirmary. His hands stuffed in his pockets to hide how badly they were shaking.

The few campers that had stopped to watch were staring at Nico with their eyes wide. Some Apollo campers seemed furious, but Nico was too tired and annoyed to care. He stormed into his cabin and slammed the door.


	2. what have you heard?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Annabeth and Percy hear about the fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is probably what I fear might be the biggest risk of OOC but hopefully it's okay. If you've read this far, hey, thanks <3\. It means a lot to me.

Gossip spread quicker than on social media at camp. Before he knew it, there was a slightly more than annoyed knock on Nico’s cabin door.

“What?” Nico called, sitting on his bed, polishing his sword.

The door opened to reveal a slightly annoyed Annabeth and Percy.

“What do you guys want?” Nico asked, not bothering to look up from what he was doing.

“What in the hell did you do Nico?” Annabeth was the first to speak. She crossed her arms in front of her chest, anger lacing her tone.

“What are you talking about?”

“With Will! What the hell did you do? We heard that you got into a huge argument or something. The rest of the Apollo cabin is three words away from murdering you.”

“I didn’t _do_ anything,” Nico said, glaring right back at Annabeth, “He kept fussing over me like he _always_ does and I was tired of it. I’m still tired of it.”

Before he could even react, Annabeth was over next to him, she slapped him hard. Nico winced one hand going up to cover his cheek. He continued to glare at her.

“What was _that_ for!” he exclaimed.

“That’s for being such a horrible friend. Will’s only looking out for you because he cares about you, and obviously, you’re not going to care about yourself.”

“He’s a medic, it’s his job.”

Annabeth raised her hand to slap him again but Percy grabbed her arm. When she glared back at him, usually Percy would slink away and laugh awkwardly. But he held her gaze and slowly shook his head. She huffed and lowered her arm.

“You messed up Nico, you don’t just say those types of things. We’re all your friends and we care about you.”

“Sure,” Nico rolled his eyes, “could you two leave, I have to talk to my father.”

Annabeth looked ready to stab Nico with her dagger. Percy put a hand on her arm and stared at Nico with an indecipherable look.

“What you said to Will wasn’t cool Nico. You really hurt him. He’s been hiding in the infirmary, not even doing his job. You know how much he confides in his work. You really, _really_ messed up dude.” Percy said, “come on Annabeth, you’ve said what you needed to say and so have I.”

Annabeth looked like she was about to protest that she obviously hadn’t said _enough_ but let Percy drag her out of the Hades cabin. Slamming the door on the way out. Nico winced and rubbed his sore cheek.

Nico clipped his sword back to his belt and let the shadows envelop him. There was a familiar tug in his gut and he was in his father's throne room before he knew it. Quite a large amount of energy already drained from him.

\--

Will noticed that Nico wasn’t at dinner. He couldn’t figure out if he was relieved or not about that. Somehow his siblings had managed to drag him out of the infirmary just for dinner.

Will didn’t speak with anyone, he didn’t trust his mouth to come up with the right words, to say the right thing. He didn’t want anyone to be concerned about him and he desperately tried to mask his hurt and pretend that nothing happened. But it wasn’t that easy. He saw Piper, Jason, Annabeth, and Percy sitting at the Poseidon table. Annabeth and Piper were exchanging exasperated glances while Percy and Jason argued.

Will clenched his hands into fists and stood up from the table. His siblings looked at him with varying looks of confusion and concern. Without saying anything else he stormed away from the dining pavilion, his untouched plate still sitting on the table.

He returned to the infirmary, trying to ignore the aching feeling in his heart, the pit in his stomach and the urge that he had thought went away a long time ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3


	3. I'm sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two very different visits to the infirmary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AH here it is. TRIGGER WARNING: blood, minor character death (It's not Will I promise), self harm.   
> I'm just gonna apologize right here and now about this chapter, so uh sorry.

Two days after the fight, things were starting to return to normal. Will had seemed to go back to his cheerful self, completely ignoring the fact that the fight even happened, though Nico still hadn’t returned from the underworld.

“Hey Will,” Annabeth greeted, stumbling into the infirmary, a half-unconscious Percy leaning heavily on her shoulder.

“Let me guess, bash to the head, how’d it happen this time?” Will joked with a small laugh, ushering Annabeth and Percy to one of the cots where she dumped him quite unceremoniously.

“Oh, he and Jason were sparring, as usual, Percy ran into a tree, Jason hit him in the back of the head with the back of his sword, the usual.” Annabeth rolled her eyes, standing off to the side, letting Will have the space to check over Percy.

Will chuckled, “yeah, that’s Percy and Jason for you.” Will tapped Percy on the shoulder, getting his attention, “Hey, do you know where you are?”

Percy looked around for a few seconds before groaning and rubbing his eyes, “Infirmary.”

“Okay, do you know what happened?”

“Jason beat me.” He seemed quite discouraged by that answer.

“He wiped the ground with you, Seaweed brain, I’m surprised,” Annabeth crossed her arms in front of her chest and rolled her eyes.

Percy huffed.

“Okay, I mean I don’t think that he has a concussion, but just in case you might want to watch him for a few hours. If anything changes come to get me.” Will smiled at Annabeth before turning to Percy, “you think that you can walk?”

“I’m going to kick Jason’s butt” Percy promised, swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

“Sure you are Seaweed brain, first you gotta rest though, I’m sure Jason isn’t going anywhere anytime soon so,” Annabeth went over to Percy’s side and helped him to his feet. He groaned and pressed the heel of his hand to his eye.

“If I see you up and trying to fight Jason again, I’ll drag you here myself,” Will warned with a laugh.

“I know you will.” Percy responded he laughed then winced and immediately fell silent, “ow.”

“You’re going right back to your cabin.” Annabeth scolded.

“Ugh, that’s boring,” he complained but let Annabeth help him out of the infirmary.

“Thanks, Will,” Annabeth called, smiling softly at him. Will smiled back and waved as they went. Usually, Will would just have people rest in the infirmary in case he did have some sort of serious head injury but Percy was never really one to like being in the infirmary for too long. He preferred resting in his own cabin.

Like someone else…

Will shook those thoughts out of his head, he shouldn’t be thinking of Nico. He was only a patient now if he ever needed to come in. Nothing more, so Will shouldn’t be thinking about that.

Everything was going fine and peaceful, Will was tidying up the infirmary and cutting bandages as he usually did when no one needed tending to.

Suddenly, the door burst open and a couple Ares kids were helping up another camper. Blood splattered on the floor coming from the wound in their stomach, the skin around it already violently colored from poison and probably infection.

“What happened?” Will asked, shooting up from the chair he was sitting in.

“There was a monster… outside of the borders.” One of the not seriously injured campers sputtered out.

Will nodded and helped them get the camper to one of the beds. Will had seen his fair share of this stuff happening so he knew how to keep himself appearing calm. When in reality, it never got easier to see.

“Is the monster taken care of?” Will asked, already bustling around the infirmary, gathering some nectar and ambrosia and bandages.

“Yeah, it’s dead.” 

“Okay,” Will worked drizzling some nectar on the cut, knowing that the poison was pretty deep already.

“Go make sure that no one else is hurt,” Will told them firmly, really all he wanted was for the two other campers to leave. They nodded and rushed out, the door slamming shut.

The camper coughed and struggled to sit up.

“Hey, relax it’s okay, you’re going to be okay,” Will promised, barely glancing up, too focused on the large wound. Will muttered a prayer to his father under his breath and tried to coax the camper to eat some ambrosia.

\--

The camper didn’t make it.

Will didn’t even know his name by the time he felt his heart stop beating and the life slowly drain from his eyes. Will stared down, shellshocked. He had lost too much blood, the poison had gotten too far. What had happened? What did he do wrong?

His hands were stained with blood and Will noticed that he was shaking.

Later he figured out his name was Parker. The funeral passed in a blur and Will was only there briefly to pay his respects before he returned to the infirmary. His hands, still shaking. Will could still feel Parker’s blood on his hands.

_ How could this happen? _

_ What did I do? _

_ It’s all my fault. _

Will couldn’t take it. Everything was too much. He couldn’t believe that he’d let another camper die. Will could have saved him, he must have done something wrong. Must have not given him enough ambrosia. Or didn’t stop the bleeding in time.

Clarisse had tried to talk to Will for a brief second but Will didn’t really register the conversation much. He knew that he apologized for what happened and Clarisse had said something else. Reassurance? Probably not. 

It was all Will’s fault that Parker died after all.

The urge came back. This time he didn’t resist. He was a doctor, he knew how much would kill him, he knew how much blood he could lose, he knew where and where not to.

At the moment Will didn’t care though. Bright red lines formed on his wrists and Will let the blood pool from the cuts. Not bothering to wipe it away, he continued. More red lines. More blood. 

Will figured he was crying at this point but he didn’t register that either. He couldn’t take it anymore. Everything that had happened was too much.

Nico. 

Parker.

He couldn’t do anything to help either of them and they had both slipped from his grasp. Will couldn’t distinguish which hurt more.

When Will finally came to his senses, he was disgusted with himself. The mess he’d made. The horrible act he’d done.

Swallowing down all the emotions that threatened to rise up and spill out, he stood up. He was still covered in blood. But this time it was his own blood. Will bandaged his arms, not wanting to waste any ambrosia or nectar on something so stupid.

Maybe he could have saved Parker with that nectar or ambrosia, or someone else that needed it.

Will wasn’t dying, he knew that it wouldn’t kill him. He  _ was  _ a doctor after all. Will stripped down from the clothes he was wearing and stuffed them deep in the trash, they were ruined from blood anyways. He got dressed in someone else and started to clean the infirmary.

It looked like someone was murdered twice with how much blood was everywhere.

_ Someone was murdered here, I killed him. I didn’t save him. _

Will choked back tears and threw away the sheets on the bed, changing them for clean ones. He cleaned the blood off the floor.

Some of his siblings came in to help him at one point but he didn’t say anything to them. They didn’t say much to him either, they knew better.

At the end of the day, long after curfew had been called, Will went to sleep feeling nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully that wasn't so bad, and if you've made it this far, thanks for reading <3333


	4. Just pretending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, if you haven't noticed this is a bit of a depressing fic, I'm focusing mostly on that but there is some comfort at the end.

Will tried to smile and bear it, to go on with his jobs but he felt so utterly lost. He barely trusted himself around other hurt campers, he didn’t trust that he’d be able to fix them, even if it was as small as bumping their head on their bunk.

The cuts weren’t hard to hide, re-wrap the bandages and throw on a sweatshirt, and everything was fine. No one asked, no one bothered to check and that was fine. Will was fine. He had to be fine.

Will still hadn’t seen Nico around camp, but he forced himself not to think about it. If he thought about it too much the urges might come back and he didn’t know how much he could resist them.

“Hey Will, are you busy?” Jason asked, appearing in the doorway to the infirmary. Will technically  _ was  _ busy. He had a lot of cleaning to do but he didn’t say that.

“Is something wrong?” Will asked, plastering a nervous smile on his face.

“Well, a camper got burned by the rock wall and we need like some ointment for that if you have any.” Jason smiled back softly.

“Yeah, yeah of course.” Will stood up from where he was sitting and crossed the room. When he reached up to the cabinet, he didn’t notice his sleeves rolling down enough to show the bandages wrapped around his arm.

“Here, that should make the burn feel better, but maybe I should come and give a look if it was the rock wall, make sure it’s not too serious.” Will held out the ointment to Jason. Jason hesitated before taking it.

“Yeah, that’s a good idea, come on.” Jason nodded and started to lead the way out of the infirmary. Will followed, his arms swinging by his side as he tried to keep up with Jason’s brisk pace.

When they got to the rock wall, some campers were gathered around a younger camper. She was crying and holding her leg.

“I got Will,” Jason announced. The group stood aside and let Will pass through. He knelt down in front of the camper.

“Hey, can you tell me what happened, where the burn is?” Will took the ointment back from Jason, she sniffled and nodded, tears rolling down her face.

“I slipped… and g-got too close to the—the lava.” she spluttered.

“Right, can I see?”

She nodded again and slowly extended her leg, wincing as Will had to roll up her pants leg. 

“Sorry sorry, it’s okay,” Will reassured her. He took one look at the burned skin and a pit of dread formed in his stomach. He could do this, he had to do this.

“Right, this isn’t anything that some ointment and some good Apollo magic can’t heal,” Will joked. She sniffled.

“It’s okay.” He reassured her again, muttering a prayer to his father again, as he applied some ointment to the burn. Magically the burn started to heal and when he was finished the skin was still a raw pink color but the girl had stopped crying. 

Will sighed and sat back on his heels, “how does it feel?”

She stared down in wonder at her leg, “B-better… wow…”

Will smiled at her, healing the burn didn’t take much energy but it still left Will tired.

“Thank you.” She brushed her fingers over the pink skin and it must not have hurt because she smiled, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome, it was no problem.” He stood up and extended his hand out to her. She took it and unsteadily got to her feet, “but you should go rest a while and make sure nothing else bad happens, alright?”

She nodded, “alright.”

“I’ll get her back to her cabin.” Another camper offered, stepping forward and helping the younger girl. Will nodded and watched them leave.

The rest of the campers that had gathered around to see what was happening started to disperse. Eventually, it left only Jason and Will near the rock wall. Will bent down and grabbed the tub of ointment, screwing the cap back on.

“Will…” Jason started, Will turned to face Jason.

“Yeah?”

“Are you…” Jason shifted his weight from foot to foot, “are you doing okay?”

“Huh?” The question took Will by surprise, “Yeah, I’m good, why do you ask?”

Jason didn’t respond, instead, he changed the subject, “what happened to your arm?”

Will paled, but he tried to play it off. He rolled up his sleeve slightly, showing the bandages, “oh, this? I dropped some glass yesterday and accidentally got cut on it.”

“Are you sure? I mean you haven’t really been yourself recently, after your fight with… Nico. And what happened with Parker…” Will winced at both names.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me, Jason.” Will patted Jason on the arm and started to walk away.

“You can always talk to us Will, you don’t have to hide anything from us,” Jason spoke softly.

“I know, but really, don’t worry about it. I’m fine and everything is fine.” Will waved his hand dismissively.

“Nico’s been gone a long time, I haven’t seen anything of him in the past few days. I don’t think that you’d know where he is?” Jason wasn’t originally going to bring that up but he felt that he had to.

“No, I don’t know where he is. It’s none of my business about him either.” Will swallowed thickly, “I should get back to the infirmary.”

“Right, see you later then,”

“Yeah,” Will walked away, back to the infirmary.

When Will got back he was surprised to see Kayla bustling around.

“What are you doing here, shouldn’t you be helping some of the younger campers with archery?” Will asked, raising one eyebrow.

“You’ve been holed up in here long enough, I can take over for a while. Go do something else for a while Will. You can’t keep moping around like this.” She smiled sweetly at him, but she wasn’t going to hear any sort of argument. Will was going to argue anyway.

“I haven’t been moping around, I’m good at healing people so I think that it’s just best that I’m in the infirmary,” Will insisted.

“And I’m not going to argue that,” Kayla walked over to him, putting her hands on his shoulders, “I’m just saying that you need to take a break, go have some fun for a bit I don’t know, take care of yourself some. You can’t just surround yourself in work cleaning the infirmary however many times. You’ll thank me later, just go take a nap or something I don’t know.”

“But, what if—”

“If something happens I promise that we’ll come to get you, Will.” She smiled at him reassuringly.

Will sighed, knowing that he wasn’t getting anywhere with this, “yeah, alright. Fine. I’ll go do something else.”

“Maybe you should go practice archery with the little kids,” she nudged his shoulder with her own, laughing softly, “I think they’d be happy to help you with it.”

Will smiled and laughed, pushing her away, “I’m not  _ that  _ bad at archery.”

“Maybe you can even convince Percy to try and teach you to sword fight again,” she joked.

“Like that would do anyone good,” Will rolled his eyes.

“Well, whatever you do, that doesn’t matter. You’re not going to be working here.” Kayla spun him around and pushed him out the door, “I’ve got this taken care of and I promise that if something happens I’ll let you know.”

“I’m going, I’m going! You don’t have to push me.” Kayla crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“I’m only doing this because I love you brother.” She patted Will’s shoulder and shut the infirmary door.

“So, you finally got kicked out of your own work huh?” Percy asked playfully.

“Kayla says I need to stop working so much.” Will scratched at the back of his head.

“She’s right, so that being said…” Percy smirked, “You wanna go swimming with me?”

“You’re asking me to go swimming with you?” Will raised one eyebrow, “What are you playing at?”

“I’m not playing at anything, just come on.” 

Percy led Will in the direction of the lake, Will didn’t even have a chance to protest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so the next chapter is kinda stupid and doesn't make sense but whatever.


	5. Where was Nico?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will needs to take a break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kinda stupid, I just needed a filler and I guess this was the filler. Whatever.

Nico barely had the energy to shadow travel back to his cabin, actually, he didn’t shadow travel back to his cabin. He overshot and landed in the Athena cabin. Startling the kids in there half to death. 

Thankfully, Annabeth wasn’t in the cabin or else that would be very awkward. It had been a few days and hopefully, she wasn’t so angry with him anymore. Nico had plenty of time to think over what he had said and what he had done, which was a lot longer than he wanted to think about it.

Nico didn’t even say anything before leaving the Athena cabin and trudging towards the Hades cabin. Maybe he should stop by the infirmary, he had some cuts and bruises and a slightly concerning gash on his right calf. But the idea of going to the infirmary made him sick, so instead, he flopped into his bed and fell asleep almost instantaneously.

\--

Nico woke to the sound of laughing and shouting. He groaned, trying to cover his face with his pillow to block out the sound but to no avail.

He didn’t know how long he had been sleeping for but he had more energy than when he arrived at camp, and the cut on his leg now was only a dull throb. Throwing on a clean sweatshirt and not even bothering to change his jeans, Nico exited his cabin, trying to find the source of the noise.

There was a group of campers gathered on the beach, some were laughing and shouting. Nico stood around the edge, trying not to be seen but not really caring if he was. He tried to see through the crowd to see what was going on but nothing really worked. There was a loud splash and a shout.

“PERCY! I’m going to kill you!” 

Nico almost turned and bolted when he recognized the voice as Will’s.

“Come on man, you gotta admit that was funny, you need to cool off,” Percy responded, laughing nervously. Nico was able to peek through two campers shoulders and saw Will Solace, standing on the beach near the water. He was sopping wet and his hair stuck to his face. Percy stood a few feet away, not at all wet but was laughing.

“That’s not fair that you didn’t even get wet!” Will exclaimed.

“C’mon you gotta admit it was kinda funny."

There was a moment of silence when the two of them just stared at each other, then Will sighed and ran his fingers through his dripping wet hair. 

“Yeah… I guess it kind of was,” he admitted, chuckling weakly.

“So, no hard feelings?” Percy asked, cocking his head to one side and holding out his hand for Will to shake. Will snorted and rolled his eyes, grabbing Percy’s hand.

“No hard feelings,” Will agreed.

The other campers were obviously disappointed in this agreement until Will pulled Percy towards him and shoved him hard into the water.

Percy cried out in surprise and landed with a huge splash in the water. Percy sat up, sputtering with surprise but still completely dry.

“Will, c’mon you couldn’t have seriously thought that would work?” Percy laughed, standing up and brushing his pants off.

“Okay, maybe I did think that would work a little bit.” Will laughed and scratched at the back of his neck.

Percy laughed proudly, “I’m the son of Poseidon, you can’t get me wet.”

“I’m the son of Apollo, I could annoy you to death with haikus,” Will warned.

“Oh please no,” Percy whined, “I beg of you, I’ve met your father already.”

“What’s going on here?” Chiron asked, the crowd split and let him through. Chiron looked around, obviously expecting some huge disaster that caused such a huge group to form.

“Percy threw me into the lake,” Will accused.

Percy gasped as if Will had just accused him of murder, “I did no such thing, the water only kindly invited him in.”

“He threw him in,” Annabeth piped up from the side. She covered her mouth to muffle her laughter as Percy gave her a betrayed look.

“Is anyone hurt?” Chiron asked.

“I’m fine,” Will said, “a bit wet.”

“I’m also fine,” Percy said, “and not at all wet.”

“Will, you should go change out of those wet clothes, we can’t have the head healer and Apollo’s head counselor getting a cold.” Chiron put a hand on Will’s shoulder, he smiled and nodded. Pushing through the crowd to get back to his cabin. 

He turned back to the crowd briefly before he left and noticed Nico standing there in the back, watching all of this unfold. Nico’s heart skipped a beat, with shame and embarrassment. But Will just acted like he hadn’t seen him and continued walking towards the Apollo cabin.

“As for you Percy—” Chiron started to scold, but Nico had tuned him out and started to walk away from the crowd, towards the Apollo cabin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah yes here we go.


	6. Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nico tries his hardest to apologize to Will

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah more angst coming

Nico knocked on the door, his heart pounding in his chest. He didn’t even think through what he was going to say to Will when he got the chance—if he got the chance—to talk to him. When he was in the underworld rounding up monsters for his father, he thought about Will, but he didn’t think about trying to make it up and apologize. He didn’t think how he was going to do that.

So now, as Nico stood in front of the Apollo cabin door, waiting and hoping that Will would answer, he was absolutely terrified. After a few minutes of standing there when there was no answer, he tried again, knocking on the door.

Finally, the door opened and Will stood in front of Nico, in dry clothes now, but his hair was still wet and plastered to his forehead.

“Oh, Hello Nico,” Will said curtly, Nico winced, “Do you need something?”

“I need to talk to you,” Nico said, inwardly cursing at how small his voice sounded.

“Okay? If you need help with something, usually people are supposed to go to the infirmary, I think that Kayla is still there.” Will pointed towards the infirmary as if Nico didn’t know where it was. He’d spent plenty of time there.

“Nothing is wrong, and I need to talk to  _ you _ ,” Nico insisted, his stomach did twists and it felt like he was going to throw up at the way that Will was looking at him. Completely uninterested and not caring.

And this was all his fault, Nico did this himself. He shouldn’t be upset about it. Will is just respecting what Nico wanted.

“Look…” Nico started, he shifted awkwardly, wincing slightly as he put pressure on his right leg, “I’m sorry… about what I said, everything. You were just trying to help and I shouldn’t have said those things.”

“Okay.”

“And I know that I’m probably the worst friend that you could ever have, and I don’t even know if you’d want to try and be friends again, but I just want you to know how  _ sorry  _ I am about what I said and did,” Nico picked at a scab on his hand, unable to bring himself to look at Will. He felt so open and vulnerable, standing here right now.

“Are you done?”

This time Nico visibly flinched at Will’s words.

“I guess so…” Nico could tell that Will didn’t want Nico there any longer, “sorry for everything and… I guess sorry for coming here. I don’t have any excuses and I’m not going to try and make any, what I said and did was wrong. I shouldn’t have pushed you away like that.”

Nico turned to leave.

“Where were you?”

The question shocked Nico. He spun back around to look at Will.

“What?”

“I asked where you were, you were gone for a few days,” there was no emotion in Will’s voice, no concern, no worry, no anger. It was monotone and blank. Not a tone that Nico was used to hearing.

Nico paused, deciding that the best thing to tell was the truth, but wasn’t the underworld what got him into this mess in the first place.

“Are you going to stand there all day silent or actually tell me?” Will demanded, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Nico saw a bit of bandage peeking out from under his sleeves.

“The underworld,” Nico finally said, “I was in the underworld and other places… rounding up monsters for Hades.”

Will stared at Nico for a long time, comprehending how Nico had answered.

“I see,” Will said.

“I’ll leave you alone now,” Nico sighed, “Sorry, again.” 

“Parker died.”

Nico’s eyes widened with surprise.

“Someone died?”

“An Ares camper…” Will’s breath hitched, he glanced away at something behind Nico, “He died after a monster fight… I couldn’t save him.”

If Will was trying to make Nico feel bad, it worked. Nico somehow already knew that the monster that killed him was one of the monsters that Nico was trying to round back into the underworld. Nico should have been there quicker.

“I’m sorry for that too…” Nico said, “I should have been there to kill the monster sooner.”

Will didn’t say anything, Nico took that as his sign to leave. The cut on his leg was starting to hurt again but he tried to hide it. Hoping that he wasn’t limping as he walked away, back to his cabin.


	7. regretful words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will regrets how he acted and someone finds out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of blood, not too descriptive though. Also I guess of course mentions of self harm

_ Why did he say that?  _

Will pressed his back against the cabin door, holding his head in his hands. Why did he tell Nico about Parker? Why did he even ask Nico where he was? It was stupid.

He should have forgiven Nico, he should have said something of reassurance. Will wasn’t mad anymore, he hadn’t been very mad at Nico in the first place, he was more hurt than mad.

So why did he act like that?

Will pressed against the still healing cuts on his arms. They stung and he winced but only pressed harder. If he opened them back up again, he didn’t care. He had bandages.

Maybe he shouldn’t waste so many bandages on his stupid problems, other people had more life-threatening things to deal with. With that thought, Will abruptly let go of his arm. Looking down, he saw that blood was starting to soak up in the bandages.

“ _ It’s fine. _ ” Will breathed out. He got back to his feet, shook his hair out and left the cabin. Maybe he should go after Nico, try to say he forgave him. 

Will wanted to be his friend, Will wanted to be maybe even something more than friends, but that was thrown out the window.

“Will, are you okay? You’re bleeding!” Kayla exclaimed from behind him, she must have been coming back to the cabin for some reason. Will jumped and spun around. He looked down at his arm and noticed that blood was soaking through the bandages and starting to soak his shirt and drip on the ground. 

Will hadn’t pressed  _ that _ hard, he couldn’t have caused them to bleed  _ that  _ heavily.

“I’m… I’m fine,” Will forced a smile on his face, “I must have hit my arm on something when Percy threw me in the lake and through all the commotion didn’t realize till now. Since I just got dressed and everything.”

“Well, what better timing, come on,” Kayla took his hand gently, careful not to touch the cuts on his arm, “I’ll get you fixed up because that’s what we Apollo children are good at.”

“Kayla it’s fine,” Will smiled in what he hoped looked like a reassuring gesture, “we got to make sure to save the supplies in case someone gets really hurt. I can manage with bandages, letting it heal on its own.”

“Oh, nonsense.” Kayla waved her hand dismissively, “we’ve got plenty of supplies, come on it’s better to get you all healed up as quick as possible so that you can be back to tip-top shape in case anything bad happens.”

Will knew there was no arguing with Kayla, but there was a pit of dread in his stomach when he realized that she was going to find out. She would know. She would obviously ask about it, and Will wasn’t sure that he could trust himself to talk about it. But reluctantly, and under a harsh stare, he followed Kayla to the infirmary.

“You know that just because we’re the doctors here doesn’t mean that we never need help too.” Kayla sat him down on one of the cots and took his hand, “Now, let’s see what happened.”

Will was trembling as he watched her carefully unwrap the blood-stained bandages. The blood disguised most of the marks for the time being, but once she cleaned it off, she would know. Will’s heart skipped several beats and he tried to calm his nerves.

“What’s wrong Will? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Kayla joked, “I know that you’re not scared of blood.” Kayla got a bowl of water, a rag, and some disinfectant to clean the blood off his arm.

“Sorry,” Kayla apologized when he winced as she dipped the rag in the water and pressed it to his arm. She hummed softly as she worked, Will silently counted down in his mind until she found out.

3…

Kayla wiped gently, dipping the cloth back in the warm water, the water was stained red now.

2…

She wiped the rest of the blood off, dabbing as gently as she could.

1…

Her eyes widened with surprise as she noticed the neatness of the lines and the multitude of them.

“Will…” she spoke quietly, her voice pinched and full of fear. Her grip on his hand tightened, she went pale.

“I’m sorry,” Will whispered, looking away from her, at the white wall behind her.

“Will… did you…?” her voice was soft, “why…?”

“I couldn’t…” Will blinked back tears, he was frozen in his spot and he felt that he wouldn’t be able to wipe them away if they did come, “I’m sorry…”

“Oh, my gods…” Kayla shook her head, “I never would… would have thought.”

“I know…”

“What happened?”

“Parker…” Will whispered, his breath was coming in shallow breaths, “Nico… I couldn’t… I just… couldn’t.”

“Is it… anywhere else?” Kayla asked. Will nodded and gestured to his other arm. Kayla carefully rolled up his sleeve and unwrapped the bandages. She gasped, tears welling up in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“Don’t be.”

“Okay… I…” she shook her head slowly, trying to clear her head, “I can heal this, this is a simple thing to heal.

Will refused to eat any ambrosia, so Kayla drizzled a bit of nectar on the cuts, they immediately started to heal, leaving only thin pale pink lines. When they were fully healed, Kayla threw herself at Will, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in his shoulder.

“Will, I can’t believe you!” She cried out, tears rolling down her face, Will wrapped his arms around her as well.

“I’m sorry…” was the only thing that he could sputter out. It was the only thing that he could think to say.

“Please… don’t do that again. Please…” she pulled away and cupped his face in her hands, “please… I can’t lose any more brothers, we’re a family, we care about you so much. Talk to me when it gets hard. Whenever you… whenever you think of doing…  _ that _ .”

Will nodded weakly, “I’m fine now, it’s fine. I was stressed.”

Kayla pulled Will into another bone-crushing hug before getting off him to clean up.

“I can take over the infirmary for you for a while.” Will offered. 

Kayla stared at him for a while and was about to deny the offer when she thought about what he had said early.

_ Nico. _

“Yeah… yeah okay, you can take over. But I’m not letting you work as hard as you have been, and I’m not going to leave you alone for very long.” She eyed him suspiciously.

“I promise I won’t,” Will held up his right hand.

“Okay, I’ll be back in a bit.”

Kayla left, shutting the infirmary door quietly. Will returned to tidying up the infirmary. He decided that he could afford to roll up his sleeves for a while since it was starting to get hot in the infirmary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Run Nico.


	8. Will things be okay?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kayla seeks out someone that's hurt her brother. And it's not a ghost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess another trigger warning maybe, slight very slight mentions of self harm

Nico was laying on his bed, facing the wall, thinking about what he was going to do now when there was a loud demanding knock on the door.

“Nico Di Angelo, you open this door right now!” An unfamiliar voice demanded.

Nico sat up and stared at the door as if it would tell who was behind the door without opening it. Nico sighed and stood up, opening the door. Standing on the front porch, her arms crossed in front of her chest was Kayla. Will’s half-sister.

“Uhh… what are you doing here?” Nico asked, looking around behind her to make sure that she was alone.

“I can’t believe you!” She shouted.

“What are you talking about?” Nico asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Do you know how much pain your little ‘argument’ has caused will?” She demanded, her voice steadily rising.

“No, I don’t know, I already apologized to him if that’s what you’re here about, he didn’t seem to accept it though. So I’m going to respect his decision,” Nico said, as calmly as possible.

“You are going to come and talk to him right now,” She grabbed Nico’s arm and he winced because he still had some bruises and cuts from the monster attacks. Kayla seemed to take that the wrong way for some reason. She frowned annoyance and concern in her expression.

“Roll up your sleeves,” she demanded.

“What are you even talking about?”

“Just… roll up your sleeves Nico.”

“Okay, okay jeez!” Nico exclaimed, rolling up his sweatshirt sleeves, “I don’t know what you’re going at.”

There were normal scars from battling other monsters, bruises, and cuts from more recently, and faded neatly cut scars.

“What gave you all these cuts?”

“I was taking care of monsters for my father.” He responded, annoyed, he jerked his arms away from Kayla and pulled his sleeves down, “and I already did talk to Will. What happened, happened.”

“I don’t care, Will needs to tell you himself, I can’t tell you anything,” Kayla dragged Nico out of his cabin towards the infirmary.

“Kayla! What are you even doing?” Nico exclaimed, trying to pull away from her.

“Trust me, Nico, please, just talk to him. You two need to fix this,” she begged her tone pleading.

“Fine…” Nico muttered, letting Kayla drag him into the infirmary.

“Will, I’m back!” Kayla trilled as she entered the infirmary. Nico hesitated just outside the door but Kayla pulled him inside.

“You weren’t gone for very long,” Will said, turning around from what he was doing. He froze in his place, his eyes wide with surprise as he saw Nico. Nico saw that his sleeves were rolled up and fresh pink scars lined his forearms.

They both stared at each other, their eyes wide, neither one saying anything.

Nico looked back and forth from Will’s arms, back to his face. Will realized what Nico was doing and self consciously pulled his sleeves down, hiding his arms behind his back.

“Will…” Nico started, his voice quiet and unsure.

“What are you doing here?” Will asked, forcing the emotion out of his voice. Kayla looked back and forth between the two worriedly.

“Kayla brought me here…” Nico said.

Will looked at Kayla, she shrugged and took a step back, clasping her hands politely behind her back.

“I guess I’ll leave you two for a bit. You have some stuff to talk about.” Kayla slowly backed up towards the door before she spun around on her heel and ran out of the infirmary shutting the door behind her. Leaving the two of them alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are almost at the end, only one more chapter


	9. Everything is okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nico and Will have another much needed talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here is the last chapter, if you've read this far, thank you so much for reading and I hope that you've liked it.

Both Nico and Will didn’t know what to say. Nico shifted uncomfortably.

“I really am sorry…” Nico said weakly, “I didn’t know that… that.”

“That I’d do this?” Will gestured to his arms.

“Yeah…” Nico whispered, ashamed.

“I’m sorry too,” Will finally said.

“What?” Nico looked up, his eyes wide with surprise, “What are you sorry for me?”

“When you came to go apologize to me… I brushed it off, I didn’t mean it like that… I should have said something,” Will scratched at the back of his neck, avoiding Nico’s eyes, “So… I’m sorry. I still want to try to be friends, if you’d give me another chance.”

“Of course… I can’t apologize enough though,” Nico rubbed the back of his neck.

“Truce?” Will held out his hand for Nico to shake.

“Truce.” Nico managed a small smile, taking Will’s hand. Will shook it once before pulling Nico into a hug. Nico cried out in surprise and squirmed for a bit before settling into the hug.

“I never know how to act around you, so I always fuss over you because I always try to protect the people I care about… and I  _ really  _ care about you… more than you think.” Will sighed, resting his chin on Nico’s head, his hair tickling his nose.

“Yeah…”

“I think that I want to be more than a friend with you Nico, I think that’s why I care so much,” Will whispered, staring straight ahead at the wall, keeping his arms wrapped around Nico.

“I think so too…” Nico muttered, his cheeks starting to flush. Will finally pulled away but kept Nico at an arm's length away.

“Was this really… because of me?” Nico asked, taking Will’s arm gently.

“I was stressed, it was a lot of things.” 

Nico felt like Will was only saying that to make him not feel as guilty, but Nico didn’t say anything else. He didn’t want to say anything to make Will more upset again.

“So…” Nico muttered.

“So… I guess what I’m trying to say is… would you at least be willing to go on a date with me?” Will asked, his voice trembling.

“Yeah… I’d like that…” Nico shifted his weight from foot to foot, he forgot about the cut on his right leg and winced. Forgetting to also hide the pain.

“What’s wrong?” Will asked, concern seeping into his voice.

“It’s nothing…” Nico tried to brush it off.

“Is it your leg? Let me see?” Will demanded. Nico stared at Will for a while before nodding slowly.

Will sat him down on one of the cots rolling up his pant leg. 

“When did this happen?” Will asked, his eyes wide with surprise.

“A few days ago when I was hunting monsters for my dad,” Nico responded truthfully.

Will nodded thoughtfully and set to work healing the cut. Nico smiled down at Will. This relationship would take a lot of work, considering how different the two of them work. But Nico was willing to give it a try. And so was Will.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading this random fic I wrote all in one sitting. <3 comments mean the world to me.

**Author's Note:**

> hoo boy this is gonna be a hectic one, I'm not used to posting on here so bear with me. Anyway I hope you enjoyed, and sorry if it turns out to be a bit OOC (I haven't finished the series...).  
> Thanks for reading the first chapter.


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